This year's moving right along, some good but as per usual more bad. This winter just seems like it never wants to end, and the tension in this city/area is really starting to get to me. Maybe it's just me getting a little older, but I feel like I'm all of a sudden somehow more serious, like a part of me has gone by the wayside, and unless something major changes soon it's not really ever coming back.

Then again, maybe this is the wakeup call I need. While I'm still beyond pissed off and irritable from the actions of a certain couple of individuals around the turn of the new year, I'm also starting to appreciate myself a little bit more. Call it a chip on my shoulder, or anything else that you will, and maybe it's some overbearing pride, but I feel better about some of the things I have going on that I have in quite some time. Which is ironic, seeing as how everything else seems to completely suck right now.

Oh well. If you don't step up to the plate, you don't get a chance to knock that ball in play. And if you get up there and and watch the pitches blast by without swinging you're equally fucked. So take your swings and fuck everybody else because they've already struck out.

Hmph cont'd

Here we are, two thousand and ten. And there go things getting more complicated yet again.

Hmph.

Well, once again another month or so gone by, and all I can think is why is it that every time I meet a cute girl who at least seems not to be crazy and I actually get along with, she's got some retarded boyfriend?

Still haven't figured out what's bugging me, moving into the new house helped get me thinking about other things but now it's right on its way back in a hurry. I better get some sleep, I have to teach tomorrow night...

Vote Vacirca 20XX

So I'm a PhD candidate now. Put another feather in my cap. Hoo fuckin rah.

Just can't help but shake this feeling that something's just not right. I can try and distract myself a couple of different ways but it's still there, whatever it is. Work doesn't really help, drinking makes it worse...damned if I do and damned if I don't. Maybe I'm better off just never figuring it out.

I doubt anyone's reading this anymore, but all the better

Going on a nice long bike ride w/ Frank D'Amore today out to Valley Forge, it feels good to be able to get back on the trails. Also feels good to get myself back on track. I'm actually starting to make progress on pretty much all fronts.

These next few weeks are HUGE. Tuesday is my phd candidacy exam already (shit, I still need to get ready) and then two weeks from Monday is settlement for my house. This makes me feel old, now if only I could act like an adult.

Titanium sporks.

Have you heard of anything so ridiculous as a titanium spork? I didn't think so, but they exist.

And with that...here I am again. It's looking like a long night again, and there's something I just can't get out of my head. If you're bored enough to be reading me rambling, go ahead and talk to me. I'm not going anywhere.

Idle Mind...

Well, here I am again. I just got in, and here I am wanting to go back out/do something again. I don't know why this happens, but it just does. I know exactly how the rest of the night will pan out too - I'll stay up until 5am or so, decide I need some sleep, and then waste half of tomorrow and start all over again.

So please, if you happen to read this, make the rest of the night interesting for me. I'll be in your debt.

Tinidad and Toblogo

I would just like to say holy shit am I enjoying this decent weather. I rode my bike into work earlier today and it instantly made me feel more alive. I can't even begin to explain it - and I'm typically not down on Winter like this, but damn I can't wait until it's warm out.

Fueled by the whole riding my bike to work today thing, I actually spent some time giving the old girl a tune-up. I finally got around to adjusting the front brake caliper that's been rubbing for about a year, gave the wheels some truing up, re-tensioned the chain while I was at it, and threw some lube around for posterity.

I even had a semi-productive day at work, I got some pretty decent results (even if it was massively boring to accomplish) and finished a good bit of grading. I even managed to not be involved with the chemical spill/disaster in our wetlab today, so bonus points for that one. Now if I could just get myself to put away all of my laundry, I'd be in serious bizness.

Beeeeeeeen a long time comin

Hello to my fans, friends, guests, stalkers, and all of the hundreds of people on the internet. I realize it's been a long time. And quite honestly I've been lazy. And I just haven't been in the mood. But damnit, I'm drunk and bored and not ready to call tonight quits so here I am.

You're probably saying to yourself "wow, he's got incredibly good grammar and spelling for being drunk". And you'd be absolutely right. My attention to detail is legendary. I'm a fucking myth.

I don't know what to say now. I've got feelings of grandeur running through my brain right now - I leave it to you to decide if they're delusions or not. I regret a lot of things, maybe more than I should but possibly not enough. I'm as indecisive as ever and I don't think I'll ever make up my mind. The one thing I want to do I can't, because I can't get myself to go back on my word. How can you when it's all you have to go on?

If you know what I'm talking about, go ahead. You know you want to.

Vacation is over

Well, these much needed few days of vacation are over. I'm not sure I got as much out of them as I really could use, but at the very least I'm caught up on sleep for the next year or so. And that's a good thing, because I have a feeling I'm not going to be getting a whole lot of it for the next few weeks - but what else is new? So bring it on, life. Let's see where this whole shitstorm goes.

Spaced out

So it's been a while, my fine feathered blog. To be totally honest not much has been happening, just really passing the the time until the holidays hit. I haven't been sleeping much or very well when I do, and really for no good reason. Many reasons, but none of them good. And so how do I make use of my time? I don't.

But enough of that. I mean I can't put off going to bed ALL night. I can't believe Thanksgiving is almost here, I can't believe the year's almost out, I can't believe a lot of things these days. The one thing I can believe is the increasingly likely and absolutely amazing possibility of taking a cross country bike trip this summer. I've got a lot of gear and things to stock up on, a new bike to buy/build, and a lot of preparation but it's really seemingly all coming together.

For now I guess I'll bid anyone who actually reads this crap adieu, hopefully it'll be under a month before the next update...

Two-fold bewilderment and wonder on a two-post kind of night

My jaw is dropping in two completely different directions at the same time, if that's possible. I'm zigging and zagging, winning the race in last place, shaving a Mexican hairless.

No, but really, this is going somewhere. I'll start with the negative. What the hell is up with my landlord right now. I realize it's not terribly cold out right now and so I shouldn't be bitching too much, but I asked him over the weekend to come over and put some more water in our heating system - which currently heats our entire home save my bedroom. He said he would come over and do it ASAP. I mean all he has to do is go in the basement, open a little valve for a few seconds, then leave. That's it. Of course it might be difficult, because he mentioned he might have lost his key to the basement. Wonderful. If it were up to me I'd be down there with a lockpick and a funny hat and/or ski mask right now.

On the positive end of things, do you ever just take a step back and go "is that really me?". If you would have told me a few years ago that I would have an advanced degree in Electrical Engineering, specifically in building lasers and optical communications I would never have believed it. On top of that, I'm a professor at age 24. It really hit me the other day when I was in a meeting at a company we're trying to get a project hammered out with (read: get money from) and I basically had answers for everyone in the room. When you start running a conversation in a room of what are supposed to be intellectual superiors and well respected members in their field...I don't even know what to say other than it's a weird feeling. The good weird.

So here I am contemplating a lot of things, life in general, the real reason behind why I'll most likely piss the rest of the night away and just stay up through work tomorrow among other things. If you're still awake for some reason and reading this, bother me - I've got nothing else going on.

Big things in store...

I'm not sure how much I can/should reveal, but let's just say there are some seriously epic plans being forged right now for next summer. The stuff that legends are made of.

On a less serious and absolutely hilarious (at least to me) note, I dropped my phone getting something out of the trunk of my car yesterday, and it hit the ground at the exact angle needed to completely remove the hardcase and send it all over the parking lot. It reminded me of playing Ghosts & Goblins, my phone was instantly naked and throwing lances at zombies.

Back on the wagon (or off the wagon?)

Sorry for the delay again to the one to two people that might actually check this, but I've been all over the place. Last week was California where I claimed the Pacific as my own.

I drove around a whole bunch and saw San Francisco, Santa Cruz, Silicon Valley, and a nice long stretch of Pacific Coast Highway (even if the last 50 miles or so was at almost 100mph racing back to the airport...) and now I'm back. It was a really worthwhile trip, too, because I got some serious knowledge dropped on me, and now my research is picking up like crazy. CRAZY.

On a slight downer, today did kinda suck because it looks like we're going to have to find some new funding for our research, which means writing a ton of proposals, but it might wind up being a blessing in disguise if I can get to work on what I really want to do. It's also really funny to me that the government will invest $300k into a project and then completely abandon it, but that's another story. How soon will the Army need a bailout?

So now that I've run out of things to say off the top of my head, I guess it's back to grading papers and watching the Bourne trilogy. If anyone's around whenever the rest of this Phils game actually goes down, come on down to Broad St. and get a little weird.

NL CHAMPS (and a new laptop...)

So I guess I've officially jumped ship, I bought a MacBook today. It's one of the sexy new aluminum ones and I really can't be happier with it after a day's use. Now that I'm running hacked OSX on my PC and this thing, I'm just about Windows free (minus my work computer since I need to run some things on there). I don't know what else to say.

Ok, so here's the part where I talk about how great it is to be living on Broad St. in a time like this. The Phils are in the World Series and the second that last ball dropped the fireworks started going off. Cars started honking, people started piling up in the streets, and the city just plain exploded. On top of that we shot mortars and bottle rockets from our back deck onto Broad, saw some cute girl hanging out of a car window flash us, and...well there's just too much. What a night. I'll never, ever forget this - and it's not even the real deal yet.

Also, one more day until I hit the West coast. Hoo ha.

Almost ready, already.

Only a few short days until I'm in San Jose in the heart of technological Mecca. I booked my hotel today at "The Domain" hotel, which looks insane (http://www.jdvhotels.com/domain/). Now I just have to call them up and see if they'll let me send myself a package, since I don't need to bring some unidentifiable vials of fluid on the plane with me. I can't even imagine the severe legal and physical beatings that would ensue if I even tried.

Other than that, I'm still sore as hell from riding to Valley Forge yesterday - especially after not really riding much in the past month after hurting my ankle and then getting sick. I guess I'm "on the come up". Time to relax and get a couple of things taken care of...check back soon.

I've been lazy lately

I haven't been keeping up with this as much as I'd like to, and I think it has less to do with not having anything to say and more to do with trying not to say the wrong things - which is pretty much the exact opposite aim I had for this thing in the first place.

In any case, a short re-cap of the weekend. Friday night I went to my cousin's 30th birthday party in North Jersey. It was a really nice dinner party, some great Italian food (big surprise there) and even a few 'memorable' moments from a certain Aunt of ours. After dinner, we wound up at a place called Lee's for what was called "Lee's Super Chow Hawaiian Karaoke". If you can't tell by the name, it's a Hawaiian themed bar run by tiny Asian men who can barely speak English but try to belt out Flashdance. Wow. So after that we wound up at our cousins' friends' house, where we were asked if we wanted to strip down to our underwear, get in the hot tub, and 'get weird'. I opted to build a fire in the fire pit and relax, then I finally started driving home. As I was driving past Giants' Stadium at 4am, I was wondering if it was a good idea to leave so late and not to just crash somewhere, but I was able to push my car up to 105mph before I got paranoid enough to slow down (it had plenty more in reserve too...) and I finally made it back to the city.

After one hell of a Friday night (and still being sick at that) I pretty much slept all day Saturday. I wound up at the bar with Roadknight for a little bit, but that's really the end of that story. Sunday I took a trip to NJ for Mom's birthday dinner, and then on my way back I stopped at a nice little backyard fire in Blackwood. Two fires in one weekend can't be a bad thing.

So now here we are back into the swing of things. I was able to get some health insurance subsidy from Drexel which is pretty sweet, seeing as that's a ton of cash I don't have to drop at the end of the month now. Tomorrow is the weekly day in Camden, followed by teaching at night and who knows what else. I was trying to mess around with writing/recording a song tonight but the 9V battery in my distortion pedal is on its way out, AND the one in my bass is totally dead. A few weeks/months ago I definitely had 2 full packs of them sitting in my desk and/or in my living room...now they're nowhere to be found. I'll have to see what I can come up with.

I don't know why I do this to myself

It's edging up on 3am, and I'm not even thinking about going to sleep. It's not that I'm not tired, not even that I don't want to sleep - my eyes are heavy as I type this. I just, for some awful reason, can't convince myself to actually lay my head down and pass out. Some day maybe I'll figure out how to not be an asshole to myself. Until then...who knows.

A day of firsts

So yesterday I un-crated this mammoth $50k inkjet printer that is my new instrument of creating technology, and within 3 hours I already knew more than my superiors thought I would know in a week or so.  So far so good.  Now today I started trying to tackle the big dogs, and it's going to take a hell of a lot more time and effort in the little cave of a room that is my new work home.  Also, the constant AC/blowing air in that room makes it about a constant like 50 degrees...great.  At least I get to take a trip to San Jose for this thing soon.

Today also marked the first official class of Professor Nick Vacirca.  It's still really weird to me that I'm standing up in front of students paying good money to be there and spouting things from my mouth, but apparently I know what I'm talking about.  Go ahead and try to tell me you don't want to have me for a teacher.  I'll call you a liar.  I also have to fill in for another class at BCC next week, that should be interesting/weird.  I might just try to be an asshole/weirdo for fun.

Alright, back to this insomnia kick I've got going on.

I got nothin.

Weekend...stuff...blah blah blah.

So now that I can't really sleep AND my head's all fucked up right now.  On top of that my ankle's still not 100%, so basically...

fuck.

An interesting day to say the least.

First off, I just have to tip my hat to Rock Band 2.  Is it more of the same?  Sure.  But the subtle changes they've made (drum solos, for instance) and a killer set list so far just make it great.

Next, I had no intentions of doing it, but I bought a suit today.  Weird.  Time to get these pants hemmed.

After I bought the suit, I took a trip up to TCNJ to go out to lunch with an old professor of mine.  It was fun to talk about some old things, some new things, and just discuss things in general.  I did decide, however, that I miss the shit out of that place. Maybe it's just something about a nice looking campus with grass and trees and some open space, and maybe part of it is just memories, but it was really nice to set foot there for the first time in a long time.

Well, the night is still relatively young by my standards, I think I might go sit out back and read some Dostoevsky, or play some more rock band, or who knows what.

Do you believe in Gosh?

So Mitch Hedberg has pulled a Tupac and is putting out new material after his death, but I'm really not going to complain. This new one is every bit as classic as the old stuff, and has had me cackling pretty much all day. RIP to the man in...funny sunglasses.

Aside from that, today went by pretty fast, though I did manage to sneak off to the book store to finally get started on something new to read. I've also made a few decisions that should hopefully pan out for the best. #1 being waking up early tomorrow for a bike ride before work (although I'm going to have to pass the office, then ride 5 miles more home, and another 5 miles to get back to work) so we'll see how this works out.

"Man is a mystery. It needs to be unraveled, and if you spend your whole life unraveling it, don't say that you've wasted time. I am studying that mystery because I want to be a human being."

Time flies...

This past week completely flew by, and now it's about time to get back to work and get myself back in gear. I wish I had taken a little bit more of a serious vacation, but a few days out of the office was really refreshing - enough to the point where I actually want to get back and start catching back up. I guess I don't really have a ton to say since it was a pretty uneventful week, but I'm sure I'll start ranting again soon. Night kiddies.

Night of the $6 concert

Went and saw The Hold Steady and Sonic Youth tonight at the TLA, and it was a pretty mindblowing show for a few reasons. The Hold Steady opened and absolutely killed it, I just wish that they would have played longer (and louder...). Sonic Youth was also sounded really great and did two encores. Oh and they were giving out posters on the way out.

This was a hell of a way to start my vacation, and I'm off until the middle/end of next week with nothing major planned. I do want to hit LBI one day (and probably bike end to end and back), I forsee a bowling trip, and I'm also planning on some speaker installation/subwoofer box building/other car stuff. And who could forget everyone's favorite: laundry. It's almost weird, but I actually feel bad taking a few days off from work because we've been making really good progress and we're already getting together our first paper to be published (and more are on the way). Just a mental note - I still need to check with the ECE Office to see if I'm actually getting my degree next week.

So, if you've got any bright ideas or just want to spend a little quality time with your favorite Vacirca (and who wouldn't?) you know how to reach me. Oh and also, stop stalking me. It's not good for you.

When enough really is enough

Have you ever just had one of those moments when everything just makes more sense? When you can make decisions at the drop of a hat and completely balance life's asshole of a checkbook? I'm not even talking drug induced quasi-intellectualism here, but the real awe-inspiring 'what the fuck have I been doing' thing. Time to cut the dead weight and move on, to stop pushing boulders up hills. August 2008 goes down as a shitty month in my book, but here's to enjoying the last few weeks of Summer. Let's go ahead and make something of it.

Hmm...

After doling out a kidney and a few other body parts today, I've got my car back. Now I can get back to thinking about...things I don't want to think about anyway. At least the weekend's just about here.

If anybody's got any bright ideas for this weekend, let me know before it's come and gone.

JUICE

...fool for a lifetime.

After driving around in my dad's car for the last few days, I can safely say that after having my car for a little while, driving an automatic sucks. Not only is it boring as hell but I definitely have a problem with going into autopilot and then blinking back into this world a few miles down the road. If everything goes according to plan, I should have my wheels back tomorrow afternoon.

So quick rundown:
-Kevin Nealon is and will always be hilarious.
-Phils won tonight, going to the game tomorrow.
-I still need to set up travel arrangements for CA.
-Even though I'm broke I want to sneak onto this Paris trip too.
-I can't stop listening to Dude Ranch.
-Fuck you.
-I'm sorry. I meant fuck you.

Valley Forge Conquered

More later, but for now just know that it was one hell of a ride. Check another one off the list.

On the eve of battle.

Tomorrow, or rather in a few hours, is the second attempt at a ride to Valley Forge. This time it won't be dark and we might be able to actually make the turn off to get there instead of winding up 10 miles past it. I'm also going to go ahead and predict less encounters with crackheads in the woods and wildlife flying into my chest, but I've been wrong before.

So where does it all go from here?

What. The. Fuck.

This weekend started out pretty strong...and took a turn for the absolute worst. After spending 10+ hours upside down in my car installing an amplifier yesterday, the huge reward was a blown speaker in the front door (it was already bad, I just had no idea b/c the old unit wasn't driving it hard enough). So upon ripping the door apart today to take a look, figuring out what it was, and doing surgery on it I discovered that my driver side door has some sort of leak and the whole thing is fucked. There's $170 and a ton of work out the door (literally).

Oh, on top of that my wireless card on my computer just decided to stop working - the third one in under a year. I don't know what the hell I do to these things, but I'm done using them. I'm running a cable first chance I get. In fact, instead of buying another card, I bought a step ladder so I can reach the ceiling and run a cable along it.

On the plus side, the amp install did turn out awesome, my mom gave me some fresh tomatoes and peppers from my uncle's garden, I went swimming last night, and I put a new front derailleur on the road bike and tuned it all up. Also, the boss is out until Thurs. this week, so I can pretty much go in as much or little as I want. Oddly enough, I'll probably go in early b/c I'm planning on making a pretty slick antenna and getting started on writing a paper to be published, both of which are pretty exciting.

Alright, time to go do something and probably drink some more champagnes.

Flash! Guten tag?! (dead, drink)

Alright, so taking the headset on that bike apart forcefully wasn't such a great idea, but it had to be done. I think I managed to clean up all of the tiny ball bearings, and if not then I'm sure I'll step on them at the most inopportune moment. I did, however, finish building up a beater road bike to dish off to somebody, and maybe now I can clean up this boneyard a little bit. If I drop one more wrench or bike part on my laptop...

Just a tangent thought here, but holy shit is life that much better when you don't mind going into work every day. Having a great boss works wonders, and I'm actually making progress on some things - a huge change from the past two years of complete bullshit. I'm really looking forward to my California trip that's coming up too. We might only be there for a few days, and for work, but I'll be damned if I'm not going to make the most of it (and my boss already told us he knows a few good bars out that way).

So looking forward, I think this weekend might be time for another attempt at Valley Forge even if my ass will never forgive me. Also, I need to clean up my act a little bit - this plateau I'm on right now is demoralizing as hell. Let's push forward, eh?

Would anyone really do that much for a Klondike bar?

Today shaped up to be one hell of an adventure. Two trips over the bridge, carrying TV's and pianos, throwing a frisbee, and of course an Old Henry. And now of course the usual insomnia sets in.

I'm definitely thinking of taking a long ride tomorrow, maybe this time I'll actually make it TO Valley Forge instead of going several miles past it. I could definitely use the exercise, and it's probably a good idea for me to get outside and think things over a bit, too. These days I can never sort through whatever the hell's going on in my head. For now though, I'm going to go fiddle with my bike(s). Do me a favor and entertain me a bit if you're up and reading this.

It's alive.

So I spent most of the night working on my bikes, which almost borders on being too productive for a week night. I installed new cranks on the road bike, trued the wheels on that bike and on my fixed gear, and did a bunch of little repairs here and there. There's just something about working with your hands that makes everything seem worthwhile. I think I'm going to stay up the rest of the night and see if I can't frankenstein a bike together from this pile of spare parts.

I tried to pay the piper. Those MasterCard commercials are full of shit.

Ever get that feeling that something's following you around? No matter where you turn, what you're doing, there it is? It's even worse when it's something you don't want in your head in the first place. Grr.

Today went WAY too fast, which is also really annoying. I played a shit round of golf, but still managed to win (and thanks to sauk for the mid-round snack) and of course it beats the hell out of working. Here's to being in Camden early tomorrow morning...

I'll take a Mulligan.

A little adventure never hurt anybody, and that's why we decided to speed off to the liquor store at 9:37 tonight. We rolled in basically as the door was being locked, and the fine workers were kind enough to help us out. After that it was smooth sailing, beers, and rock band.

Tomorrow should be a nice, albeit short, break from work on the golf course. I told my boss I have somewhere important to be.

I guess there's too much swirlin around in the 'ole dome right now to actually put anything meaningful down, so that's it for tonight.

Four.

Post 2: Electric Blogaloo.

We went and saw Step Brothers tonight and it was way better than I was expecting. But, that quick the weekend's over and it's starting to look like an all-nighter with a deliverable report for the army due sometime tomorrow afternoon. So far I've put more effort into watching Brit comedies than actually doing any work, but that's how this sort of thing usually pans out.

On another note, July and the Summer are both on their way out, which is unbelievable. Just a few short months ago I was in another place completely, and now I've got a new job and a host of positive things going on. I'm starting to feel like I'm actually checking off some accomplishments too which is great. It's a shame some things went sour but hey, that's life.

Good night to those of you who sleep, and greetings to those who don't.

Lords of Blogtown

So, this is my blog. I figure it's a good way for me to keep from coming completely insane (or at least document the rest of the trip there). I can't really think of too much to say at the moment, I think the 150+ miles on my bike this week combined with no sleep and hitting a large number of golf balls today have caught up with me. So if you're wondering:

-Yes, my butt hurts
-Yes, I can drive a golf ball 250+ yards (and follow up with a 2+ yard attempt)
-Yes, I've actually got a few new ideas for my research
-Yes, there's a ton of shit flying around in my head right now

That's it for now. Time to go read Watchmen and space out for a bit. Enjoy stalking me creeps.